18 LINES
Here's my prompt poem. It is not, of course, eligibile for the prize. If that wasn't funny to you, then nothing I say will ever be.
CRUSH
Like every day in February, I sat
slumped against the wall
listening to the wind kiss treetops
as my lover sang in her choir,
late into the morning again.
To realize it was Valentine's Day,
and that I had nothing special planned,
I put my hand to the grain
of the polished wood floor and leap
up, fictional, that lover
who does crazy things. I laughed
running to the student union building:
One orange crush, I told a man. He
handed me a soda. I ran back
to hear the choir still in practice. One
orange soda--not enough. Untapped,
my joy! A vending machine--I bought
eleven more, lining them on the floor
to you.
posted by Jae Newman @ 7:27 AM
3 Comments:
Jae,
What a poem! It's inventive, playful, coherent, and tender! I read it again and again, and my interest grew each time.
The final image is great.
I remember your fine poem last year about sharing a Coke with a Spalding friend -- maybe Jonathan? So it's interesting for me now to read this poem about another kind of soda -- Orange Crush.
Also I know that your blog is "orangesliver" so I like that you continue that motif in this poem, too. I remember the orange slivers from your workshop poems two semesters ago.
Your poems are becoming very accomplished. Their intricacy is very impressive.
Keep it up! Thanks for sharing!
GWEN
I'm reading the anthology "Stand Up Poetry" (it's the book in common for RC's mentor group), and this poem would fit right in. Good stuff!
hi Jae,
good exercise and really good poem! i love the strattling of the thin line between abstract and concrete, which i think you do really well here. this celebrates those little things that are oh so big.
i'm going to go try your exercise now. :) let you know if i get anything good.
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